Office Refrigerator

  1. A cold, monolithic block of food, food-like substances and coffee creamer found in large offices
  2. The hottest real estate market in the world
  3. A hotbed of criminal activity

Usage Example: “After two hours of searching, I finally found my Lunchables – pinned behind seven half-empty bottles of ranch dressing, deep within the office refrigerator.”

Background:  Places like San Francisco and Orange County are often cited as hot real estate markets. The demand for space in these markets is extreme. However, there is no hotter real estate market than the office refrigerator.

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In medium to large sized offices, staff members come to work every morning to play a high-stakes game of “Refrigerator Jenga”. Every cubic inch of space must be utilized, and every item is fair game to be moved. That caprese salad that started in the front right corner of the middle shelf at 8:00 am, inevitably finds itself sideways and in the back left corner by 9:00 am. Competition for prime, door-front property is fierce and space is at a premium.

The office refrigerator is also a magnet for criminal activity. Grand Theft Leftovers is a strange, sad, but all-too-common crime. Grievously, most of these crimes go unsolved, and determining a motive for stealing half-eaten, leftover Riblets is simply impossible.

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One thought on “Office Refrigerator

  1. Pingback: Lean Cuisine | Honest Definitions

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